


I'll see you again in pavement cracks

by muppetstiefel



Series: nothing new about this rage [5]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (Comics), The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Ben Leaves Gifts For His Siblings, Drabble, Protective Ben Hargreeves, post-death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-27
Updated: 2019-05-27
Packaged: 2020-03-20 13:35:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18993676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/muppetstiefel/pseuds/muppetstiefel
Summary: "I'll see you again in pavement cracks,a slice of your skin in the sunshine.and maybe if you squint you'll see me too,in everything I left behind for you."Ben leaves a gift behind for each of his siblings.





	I'll see you again in pavement cracks

To number one,

He leaves his humour.

To his siblings, Ben always had a subtle kind of wit. Dry, unassuming, but undeniably present. He was always the first to crack a joke under his breath in training, or to smooth over the cracks of their childhood with an underhand comment.

When he dies, there’s no one left to lighten the mood. He leaves that to number one.

Luther, who never knew how to joke around. Who always remained stony faced, impossible to crack with any quip. Ben leaves his humour with his brother.

He watches, sometimes, as Luther struggles to shape his mouth around a joke, as he tests the water experimentally.

He’ll pick it up. It’ll just take a while.

 

To number two,

He leaves his vulnerability.

His ability to soften and allow others in.

Diego always struggled with that. He built up his barriers, defended the barricades and kept everyone out. Ben always assumed it was because Diego was too strong to let others in.

After his death, he realises it’s just because he’s too scared.

And so, Ben gifts him with his vulnerability. Watches as Diego works to chip away at his tough exterior.

Eudora helps him with that. 

 

To number three,

He leaves his humility.

Allison - always playing movie stars, or astronauts. Always soaking up the rays of attention that were never given to her by their father.

Allison, who had chased the spotlight all the way to Hollywood. Everyone else showers her in praise.

Ben showers her in humility.

If he could, he’d wrap his hands around her ankles and drag her all the way back down to earth.

It takes this gift a little longer to settle. He doesn’t see it until a tightly wrapped bundle sits in Allison’s lap and stares up at her. Humble humility stares down at the small person.

Took you a while, Ben thinks.

 

To number four,

He leaves his strength.

If he could take away some of Diego’s defensive physically, he’d wrap them around Klaus.

The boy who loves too openly, lets people traipse in and out without a care in the world.

Ben appointed himself as Klaus’ bodyguard when they were only ten. He’s sure as hell not gonna let death stop him.

Some days he tells Klaus to be strong.

Most days Klaus tells him to shut it.

And yet still, he watches as Klaus paper-maches himself a defence border. Cheers as he holds back the inner thoughts again and again.

Sometimes the strength lapses.

But it’s always there.

 

To number five,

He leaves his childhood.

This gift was given a long time before Ben’s expiry date.

Five ran out the mansion with his childhood in his grip and never come back with it.

It’s hard to mourn someone (and something) so distant, but Ben tries.

And when Five is once again by his side, he hands his childhood over to the man who had always done without.

 

And to number seven,

He leaves human connection.

For Vanya, he leaves everything he can no longer have.

Each touch of an arm.

Each hug.

Each steadying arm and meaningful conversation.

He leaves them all to her. 

He wishes he could wrap his arms around her and never let go. But the promise of future love will have to do.

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a little drabble inspired by a poem I wrote - which is where I got the title/the little verse thing in the summary from!!
> 
> Hope you enjoy!! I promise there is a proper upload in this series coming very soon!!


End file.
